I’ve got this post that is annoying me. I’ve rewritten it about 4 times, then I let it sit, because I am not sure that I like it. And by the time I get back to it my feelings have changed and I have edit or write it all over. Ugh, does anyone else have this problem?
Tomorrow I will be home! Yay! I miss my kids and my kitchen. I won’t complain about eating out for a week but I will have to go on a super healthy diet when I get home. I need to get my butt back in the gym too.
My spanko identity is still experiencing blurriness. I’m not sure where I have been shifted. Still no DD, but definitely D/s elements alive within our relationship. Spanking has become an integral part of our sex lives. I think there have MAYBE been 3-4 times in the past year when we had sex and it didn’t include at least a little spanking. Not complaining about that at all, but it doesn’t always have the same effect on me. It’s changed in that spanking used to be a major turn on itself. Now it has become this separate event, linked, but not always connected to sex, and not always arousing. Less so now than ever before. Still, I want it there just the same. It’s (at least for me) now like a relationship exercise where something happens between us. For him, I think it’s usually about sex. At the moment, the past few months, I’m not exactly sure what it means. It’s been very clear to me in the past what it has meant, it’s just unidentifiable right now. Weird, right? My mind and body are not always connected they way they should be and that has something to do with it. I really have got to work on being present in the moment.