I wrote this a few weeks ago before Christmas, my next post will not make sense unless I tell you that…

Maintainance has come to have a special role in our weekly lives.  Ours really is mostly two or three times a week where he spanks me and we almost always have sex.  It’s not normally a really hard spanking, it is actually…I’m not sure what the word is to describe it.  Enjoyable, relaxing, energizing, all things good.  

Our maintainance spanking has turned into something lovely, something I look forward to.  We have these flower lights I love that lay across the headboard,  they create a very soft romantic light.  He sits on the bed and I rest myself across his lap.  Lots of times he starts out by just rubbing my back, or other places.  ( I am pretty sure maintenance usually coincides with his interest in sex).  Regardless, I love it.  Then he moves on to hand spanking, sooner than later, whatever I’m wearing comes off.  Next is the leather paddle, that is nice, until it’s not.  He keeps it nice for a long time just when the sting gets bad enough that I start squirming and he stops.  During pauses it turns into the most wonderful body massage.  He runs his hands up and down my legs, up my back and works on my shoulders.  Sigh…’s relaxing just thinking about it.  I start to feel like I’m melting into the bed.  Then he shocks me out of it with a surprise whack of the paddle and it makes me jump.  He’ll repeat that process a few times and then he’ll pick me up and we move on to other things. 

Our maintenance a few times a week has been the trick to keep me from ever feeling like I’m dying for some spanking action.  It keeps us connected and is mutually beneficial.  However great a physical form of maintainance is, I am realizing the most important relationship maintainance is meaningful conversation.   Like the chicken and the egg question, which comes first…  It varies for us.  Sometimes spanking opens the door for better communication (it was definitely that way early on), and sometimes just talking gets me in the mood for spanking.


4 thoughts on “maintanence

  1. KayLynn says:

    Dear Ally,

    I love the pic of your flower lights. For us loving romance is communication in many forms. It is encouraged by trusting the man we love to show his confident protection over everyone in our family. I am so happy that Brad knows how to weave it all together for you. It sounds dreamy that it would happen at all, let alone twice or more each week. To lose that edgy feeling of got to have it is tremendous. Hugs, KayLynn

  2. Sara says:

    Ally, we do something very similar, although I think the spanking part is usually (not always) way more intense for us. What is perfect is that you have together made this your own. Finding a ritual and that works for you, the routine of doing what it takes to maintain the intimacy and balance is HUGE. Thank you for sharing!

  3. Ally says:

    Kaylyn – it is/has been a special time for us… I do consider myself lucky that it happens so often

  4. Ally says:

    Sara – It’s interesting how J just wrote about maintainance needing to be flexible and able to change with what the couple needs… my next post contains a considerable change, just a it has not always been so relaxing. The ritual here is not so much how we do it, but making time to do it at all, if that makes any sense? Our lives and the atmosphere in our house is constantly changing and so do our moods, the style of maintainance has to follow.

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