my take on shaving, sort of

I can’t help but get in on this…. I read FD’s post, Meow’s post, CD’s post, and Chloe’s post.  And all the comments that followed.  When I first saw the topic of shaving come up I pretty much turned around and walked away.  I really don’t have an interest in talking about any of that in relation to myself.  I’m not trying be rude, the subject just isn’t on my radar.  However, when Meow said something about shaving and it blurring the lines between women and prepubescent girls, it caught my attention.  I have not thought about it that way before.  I always assumed that it was a preference issue for a myriad of other reasons.  So many women out there are getting waxed for their own reasons and not their partners.  I don’t know or understand much about age play.  In my opinion, if couples want to do the school girl thing, it’s not an issue.  It seems to me like the characters are teens anyway.  I also see all that as more of a D/s dynamic type thing and not a sexual attraction to a child.  But if a man wants his partner completely shaved so he can fantasize about a  prepubescent girl, I think it’s dangerous.  I’m not saying fantasy is illegal or acting out the fantasy with a consenting adult is illegal.  I do think it is very dangerous. In my opinion, it’s opening the door to the next step.  Furthermore, why would a man be attracted to a child anyway, is that healthy?   I don’t have the answer to that, maybe there is someone out there who understands this, if so I welcome your comment.  

I realize that probably no one reading this would condone sex abuse, but I am going to talk about it for a minute.  I have in the past worked with many elementary school aged children who have been groomed, molested, and raped.  Fathers, uncles, mom’s boyfriend, friend’s father, neighbors.  It’s not sexy.  I’ve had enough training to know that sex offenders don’t just one day decide they are going to go after a child.  It starts with a thought, thoughts progress to fantasies, and fantasies are entertained.  There is a fine line here.  This is really not about shaving, but about attraction to a child, maybe I’ve veered off course a bit.  When I was 13 I came awfully close to being raped by a 30 something year old guy that I had no business hanging out with, he’d already gone to jail once for housing runaway “jail bait”.  This guy was smooth and all my friends thought he was great.  I think he tried something with every one of us. His father who was in his late 60’s asked me once if he could kiss me.  Ugh…no way and I was out of there quickly.  Neither happened and I was unscathed by those experiences thankfully, and maybe it makes me a bit touchy about the subject.  At the time I had no idea how much danger I was in and what could have happened.  Looking back, when I think about those guys, it’s such a turn off. 

Maybe because I am a mom of a young daughter, I’m more sensitive to the topic.  The thought of any guy fantasizing about her is very disturbing to me.  I could care less if someone wants to shave it all, or if their partner wants them to, for whatever reason.  But if he wants you to look like a child because children are a turn on, I’d be very careful. Those are my feelings on the topic.  I welcome your opinions…

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13 thoughts on “my take on shaving, sort of

  1. Katia says:

    I happy to hear that you came away unscathed. I can relate, which I will not go in to. I think sometimes shaving my be an age thing, and not necessarily a sexual thing. My oldest daughter who is in her twenties, shaves, as do most of her girlfriends. They also all wear thongs and tiny bathing suits, and would prefer not to have things peeping out. So whatever the reason, it can be hard to judge.

  2. Ally says:

    Katia , I think I understand what you mean and I can certainly understand the need to shave for thongs and swimsuits.
    Ally

  3. Meow says:

    Interesting post! One of my first introductions to genital shaving was in age play stories – not teen, school girl age play but “little girl/daddy” age play. Not my cup of tea, but i certainly don’t worry about those who participate willingly. My only real concern is an uncertain sub with an insistent dom and hidden motives.

    And I understand the desire of young women to not have “stragglers” showing with revealing clothes. When i was young this was a problem without a solution during swimsuit season – at least in my small town. Bikini waxing was far in the future. The closest we came was very high leg shaving (grin). Of course swimsuits were far less revealing then – think 1950s!

    I have a post churning around in my brain about lumping women and children in one category. Maybe it will spill out onto the digital page someday! Meow

  4. Sara says:

    Ally, I am with you here. It’s not about the shaving. To me that is just a personal preference, but if the reason one shaves is to be little girl like, if you are into “age play”, if you go to pay sites that have models who are over 21 but look and dress like they are 12, the lines do get blurred, and I worry about that. I also worry about parents who let their 12 yr old little girls dress like they are 18…sexy and suggestive. If we sexualize our children, and play with ideas of having sex with a child, are we not several steps closer to doing, what we all agree is illegal, immoral, and very dangerous.

    “Child Molestation and Sexual Abuse victims are growing every year. Most probably it is increasing due to easy access to pornography (pornographic material) on internet.

    According to Charles Keating of Citizens for Decency Through Law, research reveals that 77% of child molesters of boys and 87% of child molesters of girls admitted imitating the sexual behavior they had seen in pornography they had watched.

    FBI have shown that pornography is extremely influential in the actions of sex offenders and serial murders. Statistics show that 90% of the predators who molest children have had some type of involvement with pornography.”

    http://childneglect-abuse.blogspot.com/2009/09/child-molestation-and-sexual-abuse.html

    One thing can lead to another, and I think sometimes drawing clear boundaries is really important! I am not saying that all who are into age play would molest a child. However, the facts are that some do, and that we create an environment that sets a tone, maybe a place, for that to happen more easily than not.

  5. Penny says:

    I’m actually an age play model and I have to say that I just don’t see it.

    The people (guys) that come to my site do so because they want to see an ADULT woman treated like a child because it’s embarrassing, inappropriate, and sexy. They don’t want to see kids. For example, I am shaved, but I also have breast implants. Big ones.

    Also, whenever a fan sends me a script they hope I’ll shoot, it has me firmly as an adult. I’ve shot some schoolgirl stuff, but the shoots that do the best have me in a firmly adult role. A lot of people send scripts where I’m specifically a very powerful woman who is being stripped of her adult abilities and made vulnerable in every way possible.

    As for shaving, I first shaved when my husband (the boyfriend) asked me to. The reason? He liked to see my genitals without all that hair in the way. He shaves as well and I have to say that I strongly prefer a shaved package. It’s cleaner, smells better, and, in my opinion, looks better. I certainly don’t want him to look like a kid. I love his huge member and otherwise hirsute body.

    Comparing age players to child molesters is like comparing a guy into safe, sane, and consensual SM to a wife abuser.

  6. Ally says:

    Penny, Thank you for commenting and I would not delete it. I meant it when I said I welcome your opinion. I looked at your site/blog and you are right, I do not understand the ins and outs what it is you do or the diaper fetish. I followed some links off your site about infantilism, I’d never heard of it before. I tried to understand. I’m not condemning age play, I only wanted to voice a concern about the possibility of it being about something else (for some.) I truely hope that I am wrong.

    I appreciate your explanation of why it would be a turn on for a guy, I can grasp the idea even though I don’t really understand it. It doesn’t matter what I think, as long as it’s legal, two adults can do as they please with one another.

    I started talking about shaving and it morphed into something else. I really don’t think there is anything wrong with shaving whatever you chose, in and of itself. I also was not trying to imply that every age player is a child molester. And I understand your last comparison, I wouldn’t expect someone who wasn’t into spanking to understand my desires. My own husband even has a hard time getting it. There are a million people out there who wouldn’t understand and would call what we do abuse. I was trying not to offend anyone with this post, I just wanted to address the issue of fantasizing about little girls. I’m not even saying that fantasizing about little girls means someone would be into age play. From what I saw on your site and the links that I followed it appeared that the appeal was an actual adult in diapers. I can separate the two in my mind, but it really is hard for me to understand. Thanks for taking the time to talk to me Penny.
    Ally

  7. Ally says:

    Sara – I agree, the sexualization of young girls is a growing problem. The clothes that are out there even for my four year old are surprising. Lacy tank tops, shorts with veiled suggestive writing on the back. Not only that but I mentioned before on this blog about some of the music and media that attracts young girls. There are the specialty stores designed to get preschoolers and up into makeup. What do we profit from encouraging all that. I think the bottom line sadly is $. If they can sell it and makes money they will regardless of the consequences. Parents want to give their kids what they want, I’ve seen parents use their kids to make themselves feel better about their own self. Living through them… This is something people must make personal desicions about – Just because something is legal, doesn’t make it good for us.
    Thanks for the stats and I will check out that link. Child abuse, sex abuse, it’s rampant. We should do whatever we can to keep kids safe.

  8. Ally says:

    Meow – I would love to see what you have to say about lumping women and children together. I’m sure there is a lot more to this topic than what I have said.
    Ally

  9. Sara says:

    Ally, I have found this whole discussion disturbing. I don’t like to think of myself as closed minded, and certainly believe that there is a huge difference between fantasy and reality, between what we think and what we do.

    On the other hand. I WAS that little girl in those school uniforms from 6 to 16. It is disconcerting to think about adult men lusting after me. I also physically developed early and had my share of attention, looks, which I was not emotionally ready for, regardless of what my physique was. .

    My daughter also developed early. Luckily she never wanted makeup or provocative clothes. On the other hand, I saw her go the other way and hide herself until she was about 18. The girl is beautiful and built. She has come, with encouragement and guidance, to slowly grow into herself and her attractiveness. Sexuality and beauty combined is a powerful thing, but she is so much more than that, and we wanted her to understand and value that. She has needed time to become who she is, and needed protection on her journey. So many young girls are not protected. Yes, we see them in the mall at 10 yrs old with makeup and “Brittany Spears” outfits…but they truly know not what they suggest, and would be emotionally destroyed should a man take them up on the offer they make in their innocence.

    As a society, we must protect our own. We are not doing a very good job with our children. Is there really a connection between calling a husband “Daddy” and Daddys who molest their daughters? Is there a connection between role playing that the object of one’s desire is a little girl and child rape? I just don’t know the answer. It all leaves me feeling confused and sad and a bit sick.

  10. Penny says:

    Hey Ally,

    Thanks for the reply. I just saw that I was the only one who didn’t think that this was an expression of pedophilia, so I thought, you know…

    I still don’t think the desire is for a mental child or childlike body. I think it’s about power–or a lack of power for those on my end of it. I think that this young lady explains it very well, for those who are interested: http://fetlife.com/groups/509/group_posts/346527.

  11. Belinda says:

    i dont fully understand your stament my dear. shaving isnt about wanting a younger girl or in anyway would it suggest that men want to have sex with young girls. shaving and waxing in any right has been proven to be more hyginic and i will inform you its alot more pleasureable.

    as for your comments about role playing and aged play, it is something that apeals to certain people. i peronally enjoy a tight laced corset, stocking supenders and high heels whist wearing a charming fiftys faninator. in short a very classy call girl.
    that dosnt mean that my partner will later in life get with a fancy call girl, it means that i am appealing to both of our turn ons. your comment on ABS AND DLs seemed rather un resurched. the people who take part in that form of role playing are exploring a sinario that really dosnt need your two cents opinion on the topic.
    i have a child, i know the fears of preditors out there, but really i would rather poeple taking aprt in roel playing then actully oing it, and i would also liek to point out that most child molestors are people who are no satifed in the bedroom and so they prey on poeple who cant fight back. not people who role play. i belive your staments are uncalled for and deeply unreaserched.

  12. cultivateddiscipline says:

    This conversation started a few days ago as a discussion on shaving. Yes shaving can be hygienic and any number of other things unrelated to age-play. Age-play is a stand alone topic and a cause for concern. That someone actively indulges in it is no reason to turn a blind eye to the potential ramifications and dangers from such activity.

    I have seen many age-play clips and read age-play fiction. One comment that recurs is criticism of the age of the model. If the clip promises young women and the woman is more, ahem, mature, the viewers are hyper-critical of that situation. The fiction includes extensive time devoted to describing nude teen-agers and young-girls being ‘punished’ for any number of infractions. However, their nudity is both public and the described poses almost always include displays of their genitalia and is public.

    It is one thing for a couple to call each other Mommy and Daddy. That seems to happen a lot with older couples, particular in smaller towns and in large families. It is another for a man to desire sexual contact with a child and use an adult as a proxy. With all due respect to those who indulge in this fantasy, you are not in any way shape or form passing as a child unless you are thin and under-developed. There are some thin underdeveloped women making a mint allowing all comers to spank them or engage in other sexual acts. But most of these women are a proxy in name and within the boundaries of the fantasy that is being created. That is the fantasy, when the gentleman tires of the fantasy is when we are faced with a dangerous situation. Will he seek to advance his fantasy with an actual child or will he repress his desires? All too often these fantasies are enacted by men with children.

    Fantasizing, forming the thought, removing the stigma, meeting a child, justifying the behavior, acting upon it. It really isn’t that far fetched an idea at all. I recall a study by the CDC in Atlanta on teen-pregnancy. It showed the vast majority of teenagers who became pregnant before their 18th birthdays were impregnated by adults at least 10 years older then the girls themselves.

    What has “To Catch A Predator” on Dateline NBC taught us? There are hundreds of men on computers around the country engaging in sex talk with young teens and children. I live in a major city, everyday it seems there is a story of some person traveling miles to meet a young person for sexual contact. It is horrifying. There are tours dedicated to sex with children, there are web-sites, there are religions that try to justify it as scriptural. The internet has exacerbated this behavior. It is not to be poopoo’ed or dismissed. This is not about power dynamics and control, this is about sexual attraction to children or child-like behavior and physiques.

    Let’s be plain. Children don’t have stretch-marks. Their vagina’s have not been stretched to allow babies to exit. Their skin does not sag unattractively nor shows the ripples and ravages of time. They are fresh, smooth and tight. Their bottoms are perky and springy, not square and saggy. Grown women do not look like children and teenagers. They ask questions and have requirements of the men who seek sexual contact with them. Children can be used sexually and discarded. They are naive and immature, emotionally simple. These ‘men’ don’t have to be men when they are using children.

    Age-play, peeing on oneself, adult-baby, in my opinion in silly in most cases, frequently disturbing and down-right nasty at times. I do not find playing with waste material fun on any level. There is nothing sexy about having my diaper changed. Like the organ-grinders monkey, uh, no.

  13. Sara says:

    To me “This is not about power dynamics and control, this is about sexual attraction to children or child-like behavior and physiques” is the real issue. It is not ok to have or even WANT sex with a little girl!

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