I wasn’t looking for it, butI ran into this article/blog post today and I have had just about enough of the “you poor women, you all must be crazy” statements that I see here and there. So I am going to say my piece and be done with it. Here’s what I read but I’ll copy some snippets for you…
Then, there’s the incredibly disturbing blog of a woman who uses discipline from her husband to lose weight. Really:
I didn’t want to face the truth for a while but I finally asked my husband to help me with this. I asked him to discipline me when I didn’t keep up with my diet. We sat down and made the rules together. The consequence of breaking the rules is a discipline session with his belt. I hate to admit that I have been disciplined more than once for breaking the rules and will probably be again. I have reached the point that if I break the rules I’ll tell my husband even though I know I’ll get the belt. This is partly because I think it would be worse if he found out on his own and partly because I know the diet is good for me.
Reading these blogs the angst and self-hate that emerges is really scary. Have they chosen this willingly? Yes, but in part out of a really twisted view of themselves. That’s the truly terrifying part.
(Ally: *This person’s blog is no longer there. )here are some of the reader comments:By Annika Aug 24th 2007 at 10:26 am EDTI tried to make some sense of this last night–or even wrap my head around it–but didn’t have any luck. Int he end, I think stuff like this is more about personal problems than the poisoning of Christian principles.
It hurts me that people who supposedly share my faith use it like this, but in this case, I don’t think it says as much about Christianity as about mental stability.By david01879 Aug 31st 2007 at 10:24 am EDTThis looks like your garden variety porn site to me. It may be targeting Christians who are afraid of real porn, but I doubt that it’s the beginning of another twisted, fundamentalist movement.By Robin Nov 7th 2007 at 3:30 am ESTI agree it is very disturbing and creepy, and I’m very concerned that it is a thinly veiled excuse for domestic violence. Whether it’s a thinly veiled excuse for s & m is another story…
But this is a way out on the fringe group of people who will hopefully forever remain on the outer bizarro religious fringe.
These ideas are not Christian and do not come from the Bible, and in no way represent what I or any true followers of Jesus that I know believe.By jskiggs Dec 18th 2007 at 1:46 pm EST (Updated Dec 18th 2007 at 2:04 pm EST)even more disturbing is a website(lovingdd.blogspot.com) goes into great detail about how to spank a woman, as well as different meanings of different kinds of spankings. If a wife is disobedient, there is a whole story about disobedient spankings, transformational spankings, and on and on.
there is also a punishment book, where the wife writes in about her bad behavior, and then is to blog about the actual punishment.
I joined the yahoo group christian dometic discipline to see what they were saying, one woman gets a spanking everynight before bedtime, and that is what she/they call a maintenance spanking. everynight now for over 6 months since ive been following this, and then on top of that if she misbehaves, she will recieve a punishment spanking IN ADDITION. Its very strange no doubt, Im still in shock!
*The one point I do agree with the writer on is it should always be consensual. I didn’t copy that part onto this post…
I found it so interesting, Sara’s reader relative question, it made me feel good to see that someone on the outside would come to that level of acceptance of dd relationship practices, even though it’s not something they are interested in. Note to self: Do not let it give me a false sense of security, should someone in my life find out it would be a HUGE problem. I feel so immersed in this community/lifestyle at this point, that it’s difficult to look at it from an outsider’s point of view objectively. It just seems so right for me, it makes me think, why wouldn’t anyone chose it? (However, I will be tolerant of those who aren’t into spanking, gracious of me, huh? 🙂 ) It irritates me how people get so upset about how others choose to live when it’s none of their business. I can understand concern on a personal level, like the relative who wrote Sara. That person is genuinely concerned about a family member. If he’s happy and she’s happy, ultimately it’s their choice. In this article they are specifically attacking Christian couples in dd relationships. This is what I believe, the Bible doesn’t specifically say do it, nor does it specifically say don’t do it. Other Christians have no right to say what they are doing is wrong or be so judgemental. It’s up to each individual to decide what is right for them. They just can’t seem to understand that some women actually want their lives this way. If they do they have personal problems (don’t we all), self loathing issues, or they are just so abused that they can’t think straight or leave that type of relationship. I will admit that there are some messed up ways of going about things, not all men or women are practicing dd for all the right reasons, and there are some who would abuse their power (on both sides). They should not be the poster couple for dd relationships! (BTW, I am speaking in general, not about the blogs referenced in the article.) You can’t take a few paragraphs from two or three blogs and say dd is creepy, it’s about pornography, we are all mentally twisted, and are suffering domestic violence. If they opened their eyes they would find a world (mostly) filled with women who love and respect their husbands/partners… and not because they are afraid. Women who are for the most part very very happy. They would also find men who genuinely love, care, and respect their women, men who would do anything for them. I’m not saying we are living in lollipop land, nothing’s perfect, but I like the way I live and I don’t think it’s creepy.
ok, I think I am done now.
Oh and the woman who gets spanked every night for maintainence, I bet she loves it!